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Wot gets me goat, though? Them snobs who reckon it’s low-class. Oi, mate, loosen up! Had me ragin’ once—some toff in Westminster bangin’ on about “decency,” while I’m like, “Bruv, chill, it’s just a massage with extras!” Happy as a pig in muck, I’d be, sprawled out, oil drippin’, some bird whisperin’ sweet nothings. Surprised me, too—didn’t expect it’d be so… posh-like? Thought it’d be all seedy, but nah, some places are swanky—marble floors, the lot!

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Anyway, I finally hit the road, cruising down the Greenhills. The view’s nice, all those green fields and stuff. But then, outta nowhere, I hit a pothole. I swear, it felt like I just launched into space. My coffee goes flying, and I’m cursing like a sailor. “Sandyford, fix your roads!”

Major blaze breaks out at south Dublin business park